Last night was my 3rd night at home, my sister stayed as she is taking me to Southampton to my first out-patient appointment
Being home has come with very mixed emotions, I feel quite frightened and vulnerable as I am still very sick and just when I need all that positivity, I am a bit low and thinking ‘what if?’anyway as Zig said to me you have it all back to front, you should normally feel like this before you go on the roller coaster ride , not after! !!!!!!
Lucy's Leukemic Observations 
Gosh you are so hard on yourself Lucy!!!! You are bound to have a myriad of emotions after the turbulent journey you’ve just endured. Just take it one day at a time and before you know it – this horrendous episode will be behind you at last. Hang in there kid. Love you lots. Val xxxx
Lucy, these feelings are normal. I remember being terrified the first night. I’d had my security blanket taken away. You feel out there, all alone & extremely vulnerable. Scared about infections, friends want to see you & one your knackered all the time & feel,like you look awful. You have to go through questioning them – have they been on a plane in the last fortnight, have they or any close family got any germs?
Trouble is a lot of people do not understand the importance & you’ll learn who your REAL friends are!
Unless you’ve been through it, or are the relative/carer of the victim, you will never understand properly.
But remember ‘little steps’. You will get back to ‘normal’ again & you will get to go on all those holidays.
Have a rest every afternoon & chin up.
Let me know if you’d like a visit, you have me on FB, just PM! I’ll not call in.
Lots of love Chrisitne xx